I agree that a holistic, factual and values-based curriculum on sexuality education in schools is necessary (Better sexuality education needed for both children and parents, Feb 2).

Yet it must also be acknowledged that parents are, and should be, the primary educators of their children. Studies have shown that when parents are actively involved in this area, their children tend to have better self-esteem, make better decisions, and are less prone to risky sexual behaviour.

To facilitate this, parents need to cultivate good bonding with their children, through what I like to call the ABCs of bonding with them.

A, as in affirming their intrinsic goodness, loving them unconditionally for who they are and not for what they can achieve.

B, as in being there for them, both physically and emotionally. We need to consciously make dedicated time for each child daily. This will bring across the message that they are important to us.

C, as in communicating well with them. Often, we tend to tell them what is on our minds. It would be helpful if we could listen to what is on theirs, emotionally connect with them, and then engage them in an age-appropriate way.

With such bonding as a foundation, we can then move on to engage them in meaningful conversations about sexuality, the basis of which is the absolute respect due to the intrinsic dignity of every person. What does it mean to respect another person? How can we accord respect to the various people we come across in our lives? 

Coupled with factual discussions about sexual development that takes place in boys and girls, such formation in virtues will go a long way in helping our children navigate the tumultuous journey of puberty through their teen years.

It will also help them make the right decisions that promote their own well-being and that of others, and relationships, marriage, and ultimately the good of society.

It would be ideal, too, if schools could partner parents in this important area of sexuality education.

John Hui Keem Peng (Dr)